Meet ALEX UTAY

The fall show might be over, but we still have one more new guy that you, our millions of loyal fans, haven't met! Gather 'round, children - screw finals, let's study some Alex Utay. I mean, your mom did last night.

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MEET ALEX UTAY!

NAME (INCLUDING MIDDLE): Dr. Alexander Colin Utay Esq. III Duke of Worthingham  
 
AGE:18
 
HOMETOWN: New York City
 
PERSONALITY TYPE: MEAThead

PERSONAL HYGIENE (ON A SCALE FROM 1 TO 10): 20 (EDITOR'S NOTE --> that's a lie)

PREFERRED VEGETABLE: Butterednuts Squashed

HAVE YOU EVER WANTED TO SAVE THE CHEERLEADER, SAVE THE WORLD? ANSWER IN COMPLETE SENTENCES:   I have wanted to save a cheerleader, then be thanked many times in different positions and locations for saving the cheerleader... could you repeat the question?

FAVORITE MUSICIAN: Miley Cyrus, wait, no sorry, Hannah Montana

FAVORITE BRITNEY SPEARS SONG: Oops! I Did It Again

FAVORITE A CAPPELLA SYLLABLE: Zhomenay

FAVORITE SONG IN THE PENNCHANTS' REPERTOIRE: Jenny

NUMBER OF CURRENT SEXUAL PARTNERS: I'm saving myself for marriage

NUMBER OF ATTRACTIVE CURRENT SEXUAL PARTNERS: Abstinence is beautiful

PREFERRED SEX NOISE (MAY ALSO BE YOUR FAVORITE A CAPPELLA SYLLABLE): No means No!

STRANGEST PLACE YOU'VE EVER HOOKED UP: In a Jewish Community Center

DESCRIBE YOUR WILDEST NIGHT AT PENN SO FAR: I was beat up by Obsession

MOST EMBARESSING NIGHT AT PENN SO FAR: I was beat up by Obsession

RANDOM FACT ABOUT SELF: I'm naked writing this right now.  My number is 867 5309 ; )